Let's try this again...

Obviously there's a reason why i just can't seem to stick to anything. I'd like to blame my 40+ hour work weeks but deep down I know there's something else.

When i look at myself in the mirror, I can honestly say I don't really know who this person is. I don't know when the person I was before got lost and never found her way back. I'm heavier and unhappier. Unhappy most likely due to the weight gain but also because I just don't like where I am. I know I will probably get shit for saying this out loud, but in case you didn't know already, I don't like Aberdeen. Yes, there are some nice people here and it is sometimes pretty, but I still don't like it here. I miss big cities, I miss my friends, I miss my old job, I miss summers... I miss my old self.

So the question is... How do I get her back?? I know we won't be stuck in Aberdeen forever and it's that thought that keeps me going. I have faith that someday we will live somewhere where we can BBQ outside and not once have to worry about rain or cold wind ruining it. But that's not happening tomorrow. So until the days comes when we leave this place, I need to get myself together. So when the time comes, I'm ready.

So, that said, I'm trying this again. I'm still having issues with running due to my abnormal muscles around my shins, so i can only do that about once or twice a week, if that. Walking is an option, but that's boring. So thanks to my friend Nicole, I've decided to try the Insanity workout. Nicole has lost about 25lbs with it and is looking fabulous. She's currently in Hawaii enjoying her new body to the fullest. I want to be Nicole (minus the trip to Hawaii. I wish).

And another thing I have decided is I obviously can't blog every day. So i won't. I tried that last time and when I missed a day I felt bad, then another and another and then i just decided it wasn't worth it. I will update when i have the time. And if you're still with me at this point, thank you.

Let's go.